You asked for it

Melissa Hart

When I got done sharing about my job and all the different things I get to do throughout the weeks of the year, I paused and told this young college co-ed, but none of this compares to being the wife and mom of four kids and because I stayed home, I have no regrets.

She was an agricultural communications major at a university in the Midwest. I knew her from the show ring, but that was about it and when she contacted me to ask if she could interview me for a class paper, I was happy to oblige. There have been several students at this university who have interviewed me for this same class project over the years, so I knew the questions and was ready with the answers.

However, this time was different. Our world is different and I felt compelled to give her a different perspective on being a career driven woman in 2022. I went down the list of all the things I have the privilege of doing every day. I emphasized how blessed I am to wake each morning to do a job I absolutely love and never dreamed it could be this great. I told her the possibilities are endless in my field. I could go any direction I wanted if I had enough resiliency and determination to try something new but then I told her all of this came AFTER children. I told her the world would tell her that her career is first while family and children are second. I explained to her about sacrifice, the wonder of raising children and the culture changing influence moms hold especially if they get to stay at home with their kids. I told her there is no substitute for moms and that raising a human being is THE most important job ever.

I detailed the sacrifice of being a one income family and that while it wasn’t easy at the time, today the benefits are endless. No one died from eating too much macaroni and cheese. No one passed out from too much work and the farmhouse bedrooms that were cold in the winter and hot in the summer are like a badge of courage worn proudly by each young adult.

I know this is not the popular view and I apologized for taking extra time to relay these old-fashioned sentiments, but if she contemplates for just a few minutes the importance of children being raised by a loving parent in a world that wants to destroy their innocence before they can take off their training wheels, it was worth it.

There will always be time to advance your career, but that toddler sleeping in the other room will not keep long enough for you to make an extra buck nor does he care about your bank account. He just wants the warmth and unconditional love of a mom and the freedom producing discipline of his dad. Children are a gift from God, let’s treat them that way.

Melissa is a farmwife, mom and freelance writer residing on a dairy farm in southern Michigan. She is available for speaking engagements by contacting her at Visit her weblog at